I have been Lutheran my whole life. Growing up I went to a Lutheran church and a Lutheran Bible Camp. I attended three years at an ELCA Lutheran College. Then I worked full time at a Lutheran Bible camp (same camp that I went to as a kid). I have worked at Lutheran churches as a youth director and I went to a Lutheran seminary and now I am a Lutheran pastor.
Overall, I have been ingrained with Lutheran Theology and that is a major part of who I am….
Sure there have been times that I questioned my beliefs. My faith journey has not always been easy. But I must admit that when it comes down too it, I do love Lutheran Theology. Knowing that we are saved wholly by God’s grace, through faith is an awesome thing. I love the fact that we as Lutherans can believe with our hearts as well as think about why we believe what we do with our heads (more about that in another post).
But above all of that, I love how we can poke fun at ourselves. I have heard joke after joke about the traditional stereotype Lutheran and I love it. I would like to share with you today a list of typical Lutheran type things — a list that I received in a recent email. Enjoy!
The following list was compiled by a 20th century Lutheran who, observing other Lutherans, wrote down exactly what he saw or heard:
1. Lutherans believe in prayer, but would practically die if asked to pray out loud.
2. Lutherans like to sing, except when confronted with a new hymn or a hymn with more than four stanzas.
3. Lutherans believe their pastors will visit them in the hospital, even if they don’t notify them that they are there.
4. Lutherans usually follow the official liturgy and will feel it is their way of suffering for their sins.
5. Lutherans believe in miracles and even expect miracles, especially during their stewardship visitation programs or when passing the plate.
6. Lutherans feel that applauding for their children’s choirs would make the kids too proud and conceited.
7. Lutherans think that the Bible forbids them from crossing the aisle.
8. Lutherans drink coffee as if it were the Third Sacrament.
9. Some Lutherans still believe that an ELCA bride and an LCMS groom make for a mixed marriage.
10. Lutherans feel guilty for not staying to clean up after their own wedding reception in the Fellowship Hall.
11. Lutherans are willing to pay up to one dollar for a meal at church.
12. Lutherans think that Garrison Keillor stories are totally factual.
13. Lutherans still serve Jell-O in the proper liturgical color of the season and think that peas in a tuna noodle casserole adds too much color.
14. Lutherans believe that it is OK to poke fun at themselves and never take themselves too seriously.
15. You know you’re a Lutheran when you hear something really funny during the sermon and smile as loudly as you can!
16. When donuts are a line item in the church budget, just like coffee.
17. The communion cabinet is open to all, but the coffee cabinet is locked up tight.
18. All your relatives graduated from a school named Concordia.
19. When you watch a “Star Wars” movie and they say, “May the Force be with you,” you respond, “And also with you”.
20. You actually understand those folks from Lake Wobegon , MN.
21. And finally….you know you’re a Lutheran when it’s 100 degrees, with 90% humidity, and you still have coffee after the service.